


Heart Breaking and Breath Taking

by Lunnashh



Category: DBSK | Tohoshinki | TVfXQ | TVXQ
Genre: Angst, Depression, Hurt/Comfort, M/M
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2016-06-13
Updated: 2016-06-13
Packaged: 2018-07-14 19:26:50
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 632
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/7187018
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Lunnashh/pseuds/Lunnashh
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Inexplicable; you and me and everything in between</p>
            </blockquote>





	Heart Breaking and Breath Taking

**Author's Note:**

> So actually I started this series about a year ago & haven't gotten the chance to finish it so I decide to just post it to boost my will to finish it. Just like how I did with my ABC series.
> 
> This series deals with dark themes because it's set post law-suit. Tbh I've always wanted to write something about it for a long time, but over the years I've gained different stance & perspective so it affects where I'm heading with this story. (I even had wanted to add some horror/ghosts spice in it can u believe it ._.).
> 
> Partly inspired by this tumblr post of "Emotions people feel but can't explain"

 

 

 

> _**Kenopsia** _
> 
> _The eery, forlorn atmosphere of a place that is usually bustling with people but is now abandoned and quiet_

 

It was abrupt and disorienting, the change from their home to just... _their_ home. Like cutting off a limb and you could still feel the phantom pain. The place used to be so loud and full.

Now, only an eery silence lingered, filled with hypothetical scenarios that were compulsively played; the what ifs. Sometimes they could almost still see or hear those who were no longer there, an afterimage from years of belonging there together. Two's not much of a crowd, after all this time.

There were less clattering of dishes, less clothes strewn around, less harried footsteps, less personal touches in every existing room.

Yunho breathed the newly found space like he inhaled acid. Changmin embraced it like he held a flaming iron. Only ever slightly, the pain faded, just so that they could breathe without choking and get a hold of themselves.

What doesn't kill you makes you stronger.

Didn't mean it wasn't killing them.

 

 

 

 

 

> _**Sonder** _
> 
> _The realization that each passerby has a life as vivid and complex as your own_

 

Yunho had always been a person with purpose. He may seemed impulsive and spontaneous but he set the main targets for whatever he did in life. He took it in strides but he knew where to head to, the means to his end. Follow his dream on becoming a dancer--study hard so he wouldn't fall behind, work hard so he could gather enough money. Be a good son, sibling, person--stay true to himself, remember where he came from.

Now, though, he was like a fallen leaf on the rolling sea--drifting aimlessly. He'd been like this for some months. They both had been.

Yunho never took his car. With his mask and sunglass on, he'd take the subways. He liked the feeling of blending in, like he didn't have a huge burden currently weighing on his shoulders. He'd go to random places, anywhere but back home. He'd been losing his way, literally and figuratively. Maybe that was just fine.

He didn't bother telling anyone where he was going. Hell, most of the time he didn't even know where he was heading himself. Some days he'd go fill his stomach to bursting, yet unable to remove the dread resting at the pit of his belly. Some days he'd stroll around the parks and playgrounds, hoping to perhaps catch some of the children's exuberance. Some days he'd go to bookstores or libraries, losing himself in biographies of people he hadn't even heard of before or manhwas he hadn't read in a long time. Anything to keep his mind off his own life.

Today, today Yunho found himself in a fish market, already bustling with activities despite the early hours. Merchants carried their freshly caught fishes, waiting to be minced by demands of buyers. The sounds of rubber boots splashing on puddles and the merchants' hollers filled his ears. Yunho was unmoving in midst of the flurry of passerbies. A nuisance in the way of people trying to make a living. Young and old, men and women, somber and struggling.

What was driving them? What kept them hanging on? Did they see the light at the end of the tunnel? Would it be worth it?

There were people who truly struggled day-by-day just to get a mouthful of rice, there were people who fought sickness in their deathbeds, there were people who were still holding on even when overwhelmed by the cruel world.

Instead of facing it head on, Yunho had cowardly avoided life with all his might.

What happened to the headstrong leader? What happened to Jung Yunho?

With shame in his chest, Yunho turned back on his way.

 

~*~

 

**Author's Note:**

> First started: 7-December-2015
> 
> Find me on twitter @ lunnashh
> 
> Comments are ♥


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